Plagued and Choked

First of all, good for you for being here—who in their right mind clicks on a blog post entitled, “Plagued and Choked”?

Anyway, hi. Welcome back. I realize I really only write when the going gets real tough. Sorry for the hiatus. Let’s get right back into the pain, shall we?

Not sure about you, but I’m sick and gosh-darn-tootin’ tired of this death grip the enemy has on my heart. It’s been there for maybe the past four months or so. It began like a fly that buzzes one too many times in my ear, but as with most things, it quickly grew into airplane propellers, creating a God-awful noise that I can’t ignore.

So here we are.

I’m always struggling with the battle in my brain, but sometimes it’s louder than others. Lately, the struggle has become deafening. The enemy has been plaguing me with lies and choking me with fear. I’ve been plagued and choked.

I’m plagued because these lies infest every single part of me with falsities that affect how my mind, soul, heart, and body function. Instead of dancing through life in the way I was created to, I find myself bed-ridden with doubt of who I am, who God is, and how so-and-so views me. And you know what being sick does to you? It keeps you from being your very best self.

I’m choked because my airways have become constricted, keeping me from being able to breathe in peace, freedom, and joy. The fear hogs up all the space in my lungs and forces worry, frustration, and control issues down my throat. I was made to live with open hands, but right now I’m stuck with white knuckles.

I’m plagued and choked, but I still have a choice. I can fall prey to the illness and the suffocation, or I can choose to take my meds and do a lil’ Heimlich action.

I can choose to release the lies, and I can choose to hold fast to the truth.

God sends suffering. God uses suffering.

God shakes His head when we fall. God catches us when we fall.

God offers a life of only pain. God offers abundant life within the pain.

God is going to take all I have. God gives me all I have.

God plays “gotcha” games. God’s gotcha. No games.

And the list goes on. I bet you have a list too…

So, listen here, enemy. You will no longer have a say in who we are, what we believe, and how we live. Time and time again, we will choose to hand back the reigns of our stories to the Author and give shouts of victory over your whispers of defeat.

By His power and only with His strength, I am not plagued and choked.

I am alive and well.